MY DADDY STRONGEST!! MY MAA PRETTIEST!!

We sit back and think about the girl that crossed our mind just a few hours ago. We spend half of hour day trying to calculate the amount of love that we have for someone who was once a stranger. 

I am 21 now. For the last few years, relationships, women and sex have been a part of me at a great scale. I am sure when we all are around this certain age, a particular girl is always keeping our mind busy. Despite being something in the professional world, we always try to get in thoughts that are just related to "someone special".

I am not saying there is anything wrong in that. Absolutely there isn't!! But do we realize that when we reach at our most vulnerable age, we like everything apart from our family. We say we love our dad and he is the best, only when he gifts us something. A Facebook post of how amazing is our mom pops up every time she makes us our favourite dish. We turn selfish to the people who created us. I look back at my high school and college days and I regret doing certain things which I could have ignored. 

I looked at my dad today while he was soundly sleeping on the sofa. He was actually watching a Tv soap and probably didn't know when he dozed off. I called him up a couple of time but he didn't reply. I got scared. I shouted. He woke up as if some dangerous dream forced him to wake up. 

I had my differences with my dad. Everybody, at some point of their life, may have faced the same situation. 

As we all try to behave like a grown up man even when we are in our 15s and 16s, we tend to go away from our family. Visiting places with them seems too uncool for us. Maybe it's not a mistake. It's a part of the trend. But a trend that doesn't seem good when we grow up and look back, does it?

My mother had been suffering from diabetes and innumerable other diseases for the past 7 years. Every month I go to the medicine shop and recite all the names of the medicines to the shopkeeper. A lady who is living on 10 different medicines make me the most delicious foods every day. She might not be the fittest but she is surely the strongest women I have ever been with. 

My father goes to work everyday and comes back with an exhausted look and practically just looks to lie down the remainder of the day. I get pissed off with this attitude. Why would he not talk to us? I always had complains about my dad not supporting me or taking interest in what I do. I still do. But a few days ago, he started explaining me about certain insurance things that he had done and he wanted me to understand all the documents carefully. He got me a new AC in my room. I wanted him to put that money in my college fee but he still did it. I may not have put a Facebook status for him, but I surely understand that although he doesn't show his support in public, he cares about me a lot. He may not be fan of my career plans but all he wants is to see me safe and secure and financially strong. 

My dad goes to the market every 2 days a week. My house is filled with vegetables and all the healthy foods. It's a different thing that I am a complete nuisance and I fail to live upto a healthy lifestyle. Every sunday when I accompany him and carry those market bags, I realize how difficult it is for him to go to the market 3 times a week and carry bags weighing more than 10 kilos each and then immediately hurrying up for the office.

I may be too egoistic too say it to my parents, but I promise to work hard and achieve a lot, not just because of my glory but also for their hard work and pride.

ALL CHARACTERS APPEARING IN THIS WORK ARE FICTITIOUS!

It's been almost 9 years since Rehan had his first crush. The girl was extremely studious and simultaneously gorgeous. Rehan was so much into her at that time, that he stammered every time she even looked at him. It took him 3 years to eventually propose the girl of his dreams. Well, not really his dreams because he used to meet her everyday at school. It was more of a fantasy. In his fantasies, beside making love to her, Rehan used to imagine his marriage with this girl, who was pretty much out of his league.

3 years to propose a single girl, eh? Rehan was sure that the whole world looked at him as a coward and a loser who will probably never get any gf and die alone. He was concerned about his hairstyle so much that he even decided to try on 6 different hairstyles in one year. All because of that one girl. 

However, the story doesn't end well with this girl. Even after taking his time to propose her, she never paid much attention to him. 

Today, Rehan is a college graduate. The paranoid predictions he made during his school days of not getting a gf ever in his life came out horribly wrong. Till date Rehan has had sex with 6 different women and made out with more than 15. 

The concept of respecting women and treating them properly was very much installed into his brain by his family members. Everything was scripted until he met some "good friends". Friends, who didn't mind kissing without being kissed. Friends, who didn't mind blowing, even without knowing his favourite colour. 

The same guy who never had the guts to say "I like you" to a woman once, doesn't need to say it anymore. He laughs it off when a "woman" of "moral values" comes upto him and talks about how important is LOVE. Oh well, even he had a love story. Rehan sacrificed all his earnings to just go over to someplace else and be with the woman he loves. She said she loved him too. But all she offered was her body and several feeling less sessions of just kiss kiss bang bang. 

With every women he has met, touching her vagina seemed to be more easy that touching her heart. Notwithstanding the fact that his words can be a big time turn on. 

He has never forced a woman into getting physical. Still very much abided by his principles, Rehan had never approached a woman with "wrong intentions" until he realized how easy it was to do it. The concept of love disgusts him. The conversation which leads to discussion of love, turns him off. It's like he has decided to switch it off completely.

But amongst all these, he has a friend. A friend who stays far away. A special friend who has listened to his shity topics and horny fantasies. Women have become insignificant to him. Sex has become easy for him and it never looks good when sex becomes easy for a man. 

Sometimes, all he wants is a just a cuddle into her arms and do absolutely nothing. 

A little bit of happiness lies somewhere else. 

A shoulder to cry

Without being asked why...

ALWAYS IS THE WORD!

I am no expert in love stories. I have been a part of many. I still have my own love story. I have heard a lot many too. What are love stories? Stories that make us smile? Stories that make us laugh? Stories, which has an arguably happy ending?

From “oh my god” to “what the fuck” love stories have been the most important problem in all our lives. While breakups are followed with sympathies, patch ups are followed with err the same thing.

I am 21 now. The number of gfs I have been with is significantly more than the number of times I have passed in biology. From hopelessly romantic to being directly attracted to a person’s ass, I have been a part of almost every kind of affectionate as well as lusty feeling.

Today, I faced something new. Something that I had seen long time ago in a movie called “Antoheen”. Well it’s a bengali movie. When I watched it, some 3 years ago, I kept quiet for a long time after it ended. The way it ended, it wasn’t supposed to end like that.

The cute online love story was shown in quite a nice and romantic way. But why did it have to end like that? Three years later, I got to know something similar today. Well not script by script but a lot of today resemblances what happened 3 years ago in the movie.

Sympathy wouldn’t have helped. A hug? Nay.

The only thing that came to my mind when I heard it, was “Shit happens”. I wanted to hold her cheeks and say this to her. “Yes darling, shit happens”

I am childish. I am not matured enough to react properly to such an incident. I am poor with being a crying shoulder. I have always made people strong, no matter how fucked up they are.

From a kid, the only thing that might sound supportive is him promising to be there for you till the very end. Forever is long time and most of the times most of the humans mess it up really bad. I have nothing to offer. Just the word forever seems to be the easiest way to comfort you even when I know you are strong enough to comfort yourself.

Always is the word. Forever is the expectation. “I’ll try my best” is the phrase I promise.

This is for you Maharani Victoria.

2 States of MIND!

I make sure I miss out on romantic flicks. I have more or less been successful in doing it from time to time. I only watch a romantic movie in a hall if I get a chance to make out with the girl who accompanies me. I had no interest in watching 2 states. But Archana is in town and I couldn't say no. More or less, I was least bothered about the story. 

Just as the movie started, I was totally into my critic mood. From laughing out too loud during "kaho na pyaar hai" remix to pointing out the mistake that the beer bottle was already empty, I was doing what I always do best. There was a scene where I even noticed that the amount of beard on Krish's face seemed less immediately after a particular continued scene. 

Everything seemed boring in the movie. Especially the romance part. By saying that, I am referring to the entire storyline. 

But there was something in the movie that was similar to my story. Oh no, there is no resemblance with the romantic part. My name just matched with Arjun Kapoor. Something else in the movie caught my attention. Each and everything matched with my story. 

I have never regretted anything in my life other than one particular thing. I have always assumed that thing to pass away and expected it to never haunt me. But today as I sat there watching 2 states, which is a supposedly a romantic movie and not my cup of tea, I realized I had tears in my eyes after a certain my point of time. I will not be able to write it down here but as I kept looking at those pieces (scenes), I did not like the way it looked. I whispered to myself, "so this is how it looked like 5 years ago".

It took me back 5 years from now, where I did something exactly the way it was shown in the movie. Till this day I regret doing it. 2 states brought back the memories.

I can't change that incident. All I can do is be successful enough to see my dad support me when I am not expecting him at all.

Mirror Mirror!! Shut up but listen to me.

“You know she smiled at me on the subway. She was with another man”, Rahul kept murmuring.

“Shut up! Will you?” the mirror shouted back.  “You are just assuming yourself to be James Blunt”

With this, Rahul indulged himself again into a long evening chat with his mirror. Rahul doesn't know that the mirror speaks to him. But somehow he understands that he must present his best performance in front of the mirror. And he does it fabulously, doesn't he? Every time he goes out, he makes sure he looks perfect in front of his mirror. It’s like he has a secret love affair with his mirror and he has got no clue about it. The mirror just laughs it off cause it believes that Rahul does everything for it.

Sounds like a self obsessed mirror! Sheea.

The mirror kept listening to Rahul as he bored it with the entire so called fling story. The woman, whom Rahul supposedly met at the food court, was having a crush on him, according to him.

“Another step towards wasting time”, sighed the mirror.

Rahul didn't stop until he realized he was getting late for tuition. He started arranging his books. But something stopped him. He kept standing near his desk for a long time.

“What is he thinking now? Will he go to the food court again tomorrow and see if the lady is still there or not. Oh well! She should be. He just said she was looking all formal and was probably employed in the shopping mall itself. Oh my oh my, I am such a Sherlock!”

After getting into such an obvious conclusion, the mirror still looked concerned for its best mate. Rahul hasn't move a bit for almost 2 minutes now. That’s approximately close to a decade.

And why shouldn't it be concerned?

The mirror was the only thing in the world that knew Rahul through in and throughout. It has seen him naked; it has seen him make out with his gf, get ditched and so many other things. Oh wait! Did I just forget to mention, that it has also seen him try to cover his neck with a rope a few months ago?

It was only because of the mirror that made him change his mind that day. Just as he was about to kick away the chair beneath his feet, he was lucky to have a look at himself against the bedroom mirror. The rope around his neck did not make him look handsome at all. The two passport sized photos of his gods attached on the top right hand corner of the mirror did everything to make their son stop from committing a mistake.

"I love you." Now Go Get A Condom.

"What if I fall in love with you tomorrow?" said Ananya.

"Yea sure! Like that is ever going to happen in any possible tomorrows" Navin replied.

Having said that, both again indulge themselves in making out for the 3rd time that afternoon. It was Navin's fourth day in Bangalore. The first time when he met Ananya, he wished she turned out to be pretty ugly. It has always happened like that. Navin actually liked speaking to women over Facebook and thereafter meeting them. He saw the world complain about this procedure, but there wasn't much of a difference that caught his attention. All the Facebook beauties that he met over Facebook weren't interesting enough to stare at when when they came face to face with him. It has always been like that and Navin never felt the need to not act superficial. 

Ananya was from Bangalore and she has been in touch with Navin for almost 7 months now. They were both happily committed to their respective partners when they started talking to each other. Like complete strangers they loved everything they spoke about. Judging each other was never an option. 

But down the road, a lot happened. To be precise, shit happened to both of them. 

But they had each other for comfort. From secrets regarding crushes to ambitions, from weird fantasies to masturbations, hiding facts wasn't their cup of tea. 

"So what if I really do fall in love with you tomorrow?". "You know it's going to be our 7 months anniversary from the day we started talking" Ananya interrupted. 

"I know why you are saying this" chuckled Navin. "I am not going to have sex with someone who doesn't love me"

"That's why I am saying, what if i fall for you tomorrow. Can you go buy one packet, please?" said Ananya with a funny yet seducing accent.

"No way am I going to do that. You can assume I am impotent, but I have too much of feelings for you now" 

They stopped. They stopped talking as if they both loved what Navin uttered. He could clearly see in her eyes that she wanted him to tell it again. But even he knows, she will never admit to that. Ananya closed her eyes and cuddled in his arm, as both lay down half naked in the small hotel room. In no time, she seemed to have found the place that has brought her peace. She slept in his arms, as he continued to stare at her beautiful face. Tears started rolling down as he knew that his lady could never be his. Three more days and he has to come back. He saved all his income and travelled almost 1000 miles just to spend a week with the one he thought he has fallen for. All these 4 days, she never let him stay off her sight. They went around, they laughed together, they cried together, they made love together, even when they weren't touching each other. 

But Navin knew something. He was having the best trip, but as he will get back to his hometown, this will just remain as memories that will never come back to him but will surely haunt him for a long time.

As he lay down beside his lady, he never thought that after 3 days when he comes back, she will tell him that it was just a favor she was doing to him. It was just a goodwill returned for his "initiative" of travelling so far just to meet the lady of his dream. He kept staring at her heart, not knowing that there actually isn't any inside her. His smile grew bigger every time she kept snuggling more. 

If he had known what's waiting for him, he would have have allowed her to hug him tight enough to take his breath away. 

Finally? Hope so..

12th March 2014.
Nobody has any clue about how happy I am today. A burden that has been there for almost a year has finally said goodbye. It was around 4:30 today that I got to know about it. I kept smiling while the college official was putting stamp on my documents. A long fought battle was finally won.
The future looks ambitious to me. The future seemed to congratulate me at that very moment and it seemed to inspire me a lot more. I called up Ma. She was so happy to hear about it.
As I walked back home, a long lost joy and a feeling of relief surrounded me in such a way, that I felt lovely at that very moment.
A stupid memory has kept covering me up all this while. That memory will probably stay for a long time, if not forever. But all I need to learn is to live with it. Looking forward is the only option when things start interfering with your ambitions. Looking ahead is your only choice when things start distracting you from your goal.
All this while when I was looking to get over her, getting back at her seemed appropriate. But today, just for that one happy reason a lot seemed meaningless. A lot to achieve, but only for the sake of my pride and my parent's happiness.
It's a long road ahead. Distraction will be that sexy hitchhiker trying to get a ride, by showing off her boobies. Have a great look. Admire it. But the road doesn't end over there, right?

The sun shines to help you lead..
The road that you travel, makes you believe..
The love and blessing, the joys of care.
The lovely little wishes, seems all fair..

He rides along, with hope in his heart..
For he'll never walk alone..
He rides alone with a dream to live..
For he'll walk, but this time, he won't leave..